Tag: courage

Rebuilding Your Island

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Recently, I returned from an amazing honeymoon voyage to the Virgin Islands. As our ship docked, we were in breathtaking awe of the pristine clear blue waters and lush tropical hillsides. We were greeted by locals dressed in colorful costumes representing their indigenous culture and dancing to Caribbean music. Quaint shops lined the historic avenues and street vendors displayed their wares with cheerful enthusiasm. One could not help but be taken away on a warm breeze of excitement. Taxi drivers lined the avenues willing to take you on tours of their treasured island for this is the home of THE “Treasure Island” boasting the resting place of much famous pirate booty, ship wrecks, water wonders with many colorful species of coral (who knew “fire coral” is a thing); animals, military forts, historic landmarks, and much tropical horticulture.


Joining other eager tourists, we commandeered a taxi bound for the other side of the is ...

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Posted in:

  • Afterwardsness
  • Comfort
  • Decisions
  • Effort
  • Family
  • Presence
  • Processing
  • Relationships
  • Story
  • Tragedy
  • Trauma
  • Vulnerability
  • compassion

Tags:

  • Community
  • Confidence
  • Connection
  • change
  • coping
  • courage
  • friendships
  • growth
  • intentional
  • relationships
  • story
  • success
  • trauma
  • trust
  • vulnerable

Purpose in Struggles

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There have been some dry spells this summer, and my withering and parched lawn was certainly showing the effects of it. My first inclination was to swing into rescue mode and haul the hose out for daily watering, believing that I was doing the best for it, and keeping it ultra-hydrated and from as much distress as possible. A little research on lawn care showed me that this well-intentioned, extra care and attention routine could actually be hurting my lawn and creating shallow root systems and an inability to withstand the rigors of future heat and drought.


It is natural to want to escape suffering as soon as possible and not live in discomfort. We usually want the quick and easy way out. As a parent, I have found it difficult at times to watch my children struggle with various challenges that they have faced. The temptation is to step in and take over or rescue them from the difficulty rather than have them suffer. Yet, I know that ...

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Posted in:

  • Control
  • Processing
  • Story
  • Struggle
  • Tragedy
  • Trauma
  • uncertainty
  • uncertainty
  • weariness
  • weariness

Tags:

  • Expectations
  • Hopes
  • challenge
  • change
  • coping
  • courage
  • grief
  • growth
  • patience

Boundaries: Who Will you Disappoint?

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The idea of boundaries is one that has been talked about so much in the past few years, many of us throw around the term in our daily conversations. If you need a refresher, a common definition of boundaries is: “guidelines, rules, or limits that a person creates to identify for themselves what are reasonable, safe, and permissible ways for other people to behave around them and how they will respond when someone steps outside those limits.”  

I often discuss the topic of boundaries with clients, yet it is still something that I struggle with navigating in my personal life. I could use this space to share education on the different types of boundaries and the possible impacts of setting boundaries, but instead I’d like to share something that has been meaningful to me. A few years ago I heard a quote by Glennon Doyle that said, “every time you’re given a choice between disappointing someone else and disappointing yourself, your dut ...

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Posted in:

  • Assertiveness
  • Comfort
  • Communication
  • Decisions
  • Effort
  • Goals
  • Mindset
  • Relationships
  • Self-Care

Tags:

  • Communication
  • Expectations
  • Hopes
  • balance
  • boundaries
  • change
  • courage
  • friendships
  • growth
  • intentional
  • relationships
  • self-care
  • self-esteem

Vulnerability is Not Weakness

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I grew up in a culture where opening up emotionally, or being vulnerable, was seen as weakness. It was for the gullible and naive - not the courageous.

Men were discouraged from ever showing sadness or fear. If they did, they were called names and made fun of for being “weak.” The only “negative” emotion that was socially acceptable to show was anger. If the men dared to show any sign of emotional vulnerability, their masculinity (a core identity for many) was instantly placed under public scrutiny.

Likewise, women were labeled as “overly emotional” if they cried in public. Women who were emotionally “stable” were the ones that cried in private and didn’t “make a fuss.” Another way of putting this is that they silenced their hearts and didn’t let others know how they really felt.

Many parents discouraged their children from crying in public to avoid embarrassment around onlookers. Parents cared more about the opini ...

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Posted in:

  • Vulnerability

Tags:

  • Emotions
  • courage
  • shame

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