Weathering a Crisis

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Weariness is a word that I’ve heard many times in 2020. We are in the midst of a global pandemic, a divisive election and racial injustice and tenision. Those factors layer us with added stress, anxiety and pressure. In the midst of all that... life continues on. We get sick, lose loved ones, move, lose jobs, lose a baby, go through a relationship break up and have accidents. Due to the taxing nature of our country and world, we don’t have the energy reserves to deal with more. Recently my family experienced one of those big losses. The kind where you wake up and it hits you. You re-remember each morning the heartache and reality of your situation. You feel the sick feeling in the pit of your stomach. You are weighed down by the grief over the reality of what happened. You experience a gripping panic over what life will be like. Life’s stressful events can have a detrimental impact to our current and future mental and physical health. In ti ...

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Posted in:

  • weariness

Tags:

  • Sleep
  • body care
  • counsel
  • movement
  • play

Parenting and Self-Care

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You board the flight, stow your carry-on luggage, and settle into your seat. Maybe it’s because you’re queueing up a few podcast episodes for the trip, taking care of a few last-minute emails that can’t wait, or distracted by your 3-year-old who is already making a valiant attempt to lick every surface within reach, but you’re only faintly aware of that worn-out phrase drifting over the cabin intercom: “In the event of a sudden drop in air pressure...secure your own oxygen mask first before assisting others.” If the announcement registers at all, it may even provoke a hint of annoyance!

To be fair, the oxygen mask phrase and the idea behind it is so commonplace that most of us have probably often heard it used as an analogy for responsible caregiving. “You can’t care for others if you don’t care for yourself.” On its face, it’s a pretty simple concept. Both on airplanes and in life, we assume we’ll have the presence of mind to secure our own ...

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Posted in:

  • Parenting

Tags:

  • coping
  • relationships
  • self-care
  • stress

The Anxiety Equation

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Greetings, Second Story community!  

The last time I wrote, we were at the very beginning of what has become a strange and difficult season.  I know I speak for all of us here when I say it has been an honor to walk with many of you through these challenging weeks and months.  And even through all of the darkness and struggle, you have displayed such resiliency, which gives my heart hope!

In these unpredictable times, I wanted to share with you a tool I’ve been using to better understand and manage my own anxiety, one that I often offer to clients as well.  In the book Emotional Equations, Chip Conley offers an equation, or “recipe” for anxiety that looks like this: 

Anxiety = Uncertainty x Powerlessness.
In a few more words, anxiety is the combined effect of uncertainty (not knowing) and powerlessness (not having control). COVID-19 has been a perfect ...

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Posted in:

  • Anxiety

Tags:

  • Control
  • power
  • time
  • uncertainty

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