Tag: Emotions

We all grow up in a family system. What we might not always realize is that each of us assume a role in that system to make it “work.” This can be based on birth order, needs to manage specific relationships in the family or simply occur without much thought or attention. However, the role we assume in the family often leads to issues as we navigate life outside the system.

For example, let’s say that you have taken on a responsibility role in the family. You are often the one the family expects to fix whatever problems arise. Maybe it was as small as helping your siblings with their homework or as large as helping a family member manage an addiction. Either way, the message was that it was up to you to take care of the family. As you fill that role, it becomes ingrained within you. Without realizing it becomes one of your core drives. As you grow older and step out into the world, you do so with this drive firmly entrenched and ...

Forgiveness is a cornerstone of healthy relationships, yet it is often one of the hardest acts to perform. Understanding why forgiveness is challenging and recognizing its profound benefits can help individuals and couples navigate the complexities of their relationships with greater empathy and resilience.

Why Forgiveness is Hard

Forgiveness requires us to confront our pain and vulnerability. When someone we care about hurts us, it triggers a range of intense emotions—anger, betrayal, sadness—that can be difficult to process. Holding onto these feelings can create a sense of control or protection, making it feel safer than the perceived risk of getting hurt again. Additionally, societal messages often equate forgiveness with weakness or submission, further complicating our willingness to let go of resentment.

Forgiveness also involves a shift in perspective. It requires empathy and understanding towards ...

Unlike a lot of people my age, I didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers Neighborhood. I discovered Fred Rogers later on in life through documentaries, and the more I learned about him the more I became a fan. He was a man who exemplified qualities like kindness, curiosity, and compassion. He taught children and adults to feel, name, and express their emotions rather than ignoring them. And he had mastered the art of exuding love through his simple presence.

Six years before he died, he received a Lifetime Achievement Award during which he gave a very short acceptance speech. He used 10 seconds of that speech to invite the audience to remember all the people who had helped them become who they are. Here are a few of his words from that night:

“All of us have special ones who have loved us into being. Would you just take, along with me, 10 seconds to think of the people who have helped you become who you are. Th ...