Tag: self-esteem

We all grow up in a family system. What we might not always realize is that each of us assume a role in that system to make it “work.” This can be based on birth order, needs to manage specific relationships in the family or simply occur without much thought or attention. However, the role we assume in the family often leads to issues as we navigate life outside the system.

For example, let’s say that you have taken on a responsibility role in the family. You are often the one the family expects to fix whatever problems arise. Maybe it was as small as helping your siblings with their homework or as large as helping a family member manage an addiction. Either way, the message was that it was up to you to take care of the family. As you fill that role, it becomes ingrained within you. Without realizing it becomes one of your core drives. As you grow older and step out into the world, you do so with this drive firmly entrenched and ...

Unlike a lot of people my age, I didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers Neighborhood. I discovered Fred Rogers later on in life through documentaries, and the more I learned about him the more I became a fan. He was a man who exemplified qualities like kindness, curiosity, and compassion. He taught children and adults to feel, name, and express their emotions rather than ignoring them. And he had mastered the art of exuding love through his simple presence.

Six years before he died, he received a Lifetime Achievement Award during which he gave a very short acceptance speech. He used 10 seconds of that speech to invite the audience to remember all the people who had helped them become who they are. Here are a few of his words from that night:

“All of us have special ones who have loved us into being. Would you just take, along with me, 10 seconds to think of the people who have helped you become who you are. Th ...

There are very few roles in the world with the expectation to be and do it all, quite like the role of a mother. There are also many contradicting messages about what exactly all of the IT we are meant to be doing is. So often, instead of challenging this ridiculous expectation, mothers succumb to the overwhelm of it all and just end up feeling like failures. The reality is, when you are expected to be and do it all, and you push yourself to achieve it, you are never really going to be doing any of it particularly well. How could you? This sets moms up for burnout in the one job you can not give up.

I recognize this phenomenon in every mom that sits across from me in therapy and I look upon their faces with so much empathy because years ago, that was me! What changed the game for my motherhood a few years ago, is that I came across the podcast, The Lazy Genius, and felt like this woman was throwing me a lifeline! She encouraged her listen ...