Tag: power

We all grow up in a family system. What we might not always realize is that each of us assume a role in that system to make it “work.” This can be based on birth order, needs to manage specific relationships in the family or simply occur without much thought or attention. However, the role we assume in the family often leads to issues as we navigate life outside the system.

For example, let’s say that you have taken on a responsibility role in the family. You are often the one the family expects to fix whatever problems arise. Maybe it was as small as helping your siblings with their homework or as large as helping a family member manage an addiction. Either way, the message was that it was up to you to take care of the family. As you fill that role, it becomes ingrained within you. Without realizing it becomes one of your core drives. As you grow older and step out into the world, you do so with this drive firmly entrenched and ...

Greetings, Second Story community!  

The last time I wrote, we were at the very beginning of what has become a strange and difficult season.  I know I speak for all of us here when I say it has been an honor to walk with many of you through these challenging weeks and months.  And even through all of the darkness and struggle, you have displayed such resiliency, which gives my heart hope!

In these unpredictable times, I wanted to share with you a tool I’ve been using to better understand and manage my own anxiety, one that I often offer to clients as well.  In the book Emotional Equations, Chip Conley offers an equation, or “recipe” for anxiety that looks like this: 

Anxiety = Uncertainty x Powerlessness.
In a few more words, anxiety is the combined effect of uncertainty (not knowing) and powerlessness (not having control). COVID-19 has been a perfect ...