Tag: compassion

For years I often heard people say that you have to go through grief and pain, you can’t go around it, you can’t go above it, you have to go through it. For years I didn’t understand what that meant. We live in an incredibly emotionally avoidant culture which then leads to chronic mental emotional health struggles, high addiction and disconnection from self and others among other symptoms. 

In order to move through grief or pain a person must create a safe space for emotions to build. Like a wave on a beach, emotions need to be able to build and crash safely on the shore before they can recede out and become calm again. Instead of allowing the natural flow, we often dam up the water as high as we can to keep it from crashing, but then when it inevitably breaks the dam, and the lifetime of suppressed emotions can come cascading and flooding ...

One of the most impactful books that I have ever read is called “The Wisdom of Your Body” by Dr. Hillary McBride. Think of this as part book review, part encouragement to go read this book and an invitation to step into wholeness, connection, and healing through embodiment. 

So, what exactly is embodiment? McBride states that “there is no unified definition of embodiment.” It is often understood as a ‘quality or idea that is being lived out.” For example, an author or speaker hopefully lives out what they write about or speak about, thus embodying their platform or message.  In the context of this book, McBride describes it as something farther reaching. That is, “the experience of being a body in a social context.” It means that to live embodied is to unapologetically take up space. 

McBri ...

The two biggest factors that influence your present day relationship patterns are: 

1. How you experienced conflict in your family of origin.
2. How/if you received comfort in your family of origin.

Let me illustrate with two versions of the same story, with different endings: 

Version 1: 

Imagine that you’re 5 years old, find a mental picture of yourself at that age. What did your hair look like, what was a favorite outfit that you may have been wearing? Once you have that image, imagine yourself at that age coming back from a family vacation in another state. Your family has already driven 3 hours away from the vacation spot toward home and are getting back in the vehicle after a rest stop. Your parents are trying to help you into the family car when you realize that you left your favorite teddy bear back at your vacation spot. Your comfo ...