On Valentine's Day

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January and February are often busy months in our counseling office, and this year is no exception. A combination of Seasonal Affective Disorder, the post-holiday blues, and the doldrums of West Michigan winter can cause understandable feelings of depression and sadness. I myself have experienced this phenomenon regularly for most of my adult life and unconsciously looked for ways to brighten up these months and give myself a boost in mood — some of my solutions worked well, others not so much. And while Bachelor Mondays can be a psychologically rich diversion… allow me to present to you an alternative balm to the soul that can warm up even the coldest and darkest of January/February evenings: Valentine’s Day.

Now, hear me out. I am aware that Valentine’s Day is a polarizing holiday. “It’s too commercial!” you might say, as you notice the rising prices of greeting cards and heart shaped candy. “It’s elitist and demoralizing!” you may cry as you are inundated with ads that elevate romantic love as the pinnacle of existence. “It’s too much pressure!” you could lament as you scramble to find the last dozen roses at the grocery store on February 13th. And you may be right on all those points. But when embraced for the pure, wholehearted celebration of love in all forms that it can be, Valentine’s Day is just about the best thing that could happen to February.

In January and February, I am often looking for purpose. Spending quiet evenings at home, creating valentines for friends and family gives me something to work towards with a distinct deadline. I am looking for connection. Sending a card or a note to someone in my life, maybe someone I haven’t spoken with in awhile, opens a door to conversation and reminds me that I’m not alone. I am looking for joy. Making or finding beautiful things to share and celebrate LOVE is true delight. And focusing on loving and serving others is a giant step stool to help me climb out of the dark pit of self-absorption and despair that can present itself this time of year.

There are many other ways to work through darkness and sadness (at Second Story we absolutely love talking about all of them). But this year, I’d encourage you to give Valentine’s Day a try. You never know, you may be just one heart-shaped piece of construction paper away from a genuine smile.

Audrey Aukeman, LPC

1 Comment

Nick Burner
Thank you for this creative reminder of unique ways to look for connection and joy in these cold, dark weeks of winter.
February 13, 2023

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