Leaning Into Discomfort

Personal growth can oftentimes feel uncomfortable. We can know what we have to do to move toward the life we envision, but struggle to take the necessary steps to get where we want to be. When approaching discomfort, the urge to turn away due to uncomfortable feelings in the mind and body can be a powerful force to come face to face with. 

Seeking discomfort does not mean chasing pain, or forcing ourselves into dangerous or overwhelming situations. It means developing a skill set to deal with things when they get awkward, uncertain, or challenging, and coping with those feelings long enough to gain insight about ourselves. Experiencing discomfort can often be a sign that we are stretching beyond our old patterns, and working toward becoming the person you want to be. When discomfort is avoided, we also avoid opportunities for personal growth and change. 

Think about a time when you did something difficult, maybe something you didn’t think you could do. Reflect on defining moments in your life, starting therapy, achieving a goal, setting boundaries for yourself, speaking up for yourself, advocating for others, or prioritizing yourself in times when others may have needed help. Seeking discomfort often asks us to reflect on what we are capable of. It points out strengths that we may not know we have. We can gain clarity about our limits, values, and priorities. 

Seeking discomfort is not about being fearless or reckless, but rather acting in alignment with what matters to you, even when your mind and body may be telling you to turn back to old, safe patterns. Self growth happens when we choose curiosity, perseverance, vulnerability, resiliency, and compassion over avoidance, fear, and self-criticism. These are not giant leaps and bounds, but rather small actionable steps we take with thought and intention. 

Self growth occurs on the other side of discomfort. When faced with a moment of discomfort, reflect on the idea that the very thing we are avoiding could be the door that leads to the growth you’re seeking. Notice the resistance, stay with it, breathe with intention, and seek discomfort.